Monday, April 28, 2008

1,2,3 babies

My sister sent me this e-mail... you may have seen it, but it was tooo good not to post!
Thanks Kelly!

BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN

You're pregnant
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother cause you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash newborns clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries:
1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Pacifier:
1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Diapering:
1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

Activities:
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.

Going Out:
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children

Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!


I would have to agree with many of them although I would say that I reached some of the 3rd child stuff with my 2nd one!
I need to add...
That my favorite comment is
"If it's not bleeding or broken I don't want to hear about it!"

4 comments:

3boys247 said...

Ah yes, those poor third children. My parents had hours of 8mm film of my brother (first born) sleeping, a few minutes of me and nothing of my little sister. I try to keep things equal, but it just doesn't happen. I hope to get Hayden's first year scrapbook done before he starts kindergarten.

4funboys said...

this is sooooooo true!

thanks for the laugh...

can you imagine how bad it is for boy #4?

Peggy said...

Too funny! I like the part about spending the majority of your day hiding from the children! That's been my week so far... :-) And I only have 2!

McMommy said...

I've seen it before but I still laugh like it's the first time I've ever read it!!!!!

I love, love, LOVE it! My poor Carter is like a combo of Babies #2 and #3.